Brian Anderson Over Hulton Report
Tuesday 10th November
On a beautiful Autumn day the final round of the league season was upon us. McCarlton asked all to gather closer in and welcomed one and all, always a little sad that the end of the season has come around so quickly. We must all thank Mr.CC for his warm and welcoming comments each match day; Today he showed us another of his amazing character traits, namely that respect and remembrance always go hand in hand. In memory of so many who gave so much, he asked us all to show our respects to the fallen as a group, the last post was played and we all remembered……………..
On the day that the league title would be decided both Forrest Rangers and Wasps were the likely winners, however it wasn't out of the question that the Hultoneers could pick up on any slip ups.
As the first games began, Forrest Rangers started very strongly taking the first 7 points, Wasps were falling behind, the Hultoneers were holding their own (the rumours may be true). As it stood the Rangers needed to win all 3 games to be sure, Wasps were hoping for a slip up and Tom’s Lot were trying to pinch 3rd place off the Hultoneers, for whom a single point would be enough. As the games progressed Rangers looked to be well in control, however the Wasps were not having all their own way. Whilst this was playing out the Old Hultonians were gaining the upper hand against Doe Hey.
Anderson and Warburton landed the first game point with a 15-4 vs Maslovic and Brooks, Mort and Williams managed to also get over the line with a 15-12 over Maggie and Clive. Toms lot scored a 15-9 over Paul and Brian Fairclough. The (Very Old) Hultonians just edged the very oldest Eric and Michael 15-14, could they win again ?
Round 2 set off with everything still to play for, the top average players of Bailey and Wolfendale taking on the ever impressive Smith and Boardman, this was a pivotal game and the Forresters gained a 11-3 advantage. This also guaranteed them the top Average players this season, however they seemed to suffer a power failure and found themselves 12-14 down. They then rallied with some brave, but excellent bowls, to tie the game into a final end shootout. This ended after bowl 7 and the door was flung open for the Wasps. Were Stuart Ivers and Mark Bradshaw going to miss the chance ? despite some excellent bowls from Rick and Harry the game ended in a 15-10 to the Wasps pair. Elsewhere, Tom’s lot top batters, Barry and Mick were taking on Morton and Nugent. it seemed that Toms lot have found their mojo a week too late, and despite a very much under the weather Morton putting up strong resistance the game was gone, now 2-0 to Toms Lot. In the final match up the Old Hultonians gained a second win on the day as Carlton and Mr Phil HODSON did what they have been doing between them for the past 130 years.
The final games began, could the Forresters find a way to lose? would Clives Bunch do them a favour? was it possible Toms Lot could steal 3rd place ? and would the Hultonians hold on for another win ?
The Forresters wheeled out a secret weapon in the shape of Mark Cafferky, playing alongside Ste Openshaw what could possibly go wrong ? at 3-5 down the bells were ringing, Wasps pairing of Joe and Mick started strongly against Dave and Peter C, but were not quite able to shake them off. The Hultoneers now knew they needed to win the last match up to retain 3rd place. This game and match was settled decisively in favour of Tom’s Lot as the very nice Mr Risley and Andy Johnson lost to 3 against Ray and David Wakefield. What a fantastic debut season for David, well played Toms Lot.
In what then became a fairly one sided affair Mark and Ste played out a great game to carry off the league title. On the other side of the green a certain Mr. Clinton was using his wingers to great advantage and making points, this game going to Clives pairing 15-12. Peter will be flooded with congratulations cards from the Forresters, The final match Steve and Tony saved face for Doe Hey taking the honours 15-12 against Steve peak and the luckless Gary Yates.
McCarlton in his final summing up during the prize giving said the winter league has become more like a family gathering, everyone comfortable with each other, teams competing in a superb and respected manner.
In this respect we must now always remember that the whole winter league concept, set up, and organisation, was devised and implemented by Mr. Ray Barnes and Mr. Michael Sullivan as a way to prolong the bowling season in Bolton. I think it’s fair to say this has been, and is, a huge success, many thanks gentlemen for your foresight and endeavour, it is very much appreciated by all.
Finally wishing everyone good health and happiness. It reminds me my wife has been a little down suffering from Hay fever of late and now diabetes, I have tried to cheer her up, you know, flowers and chocolates. I had a touch of Flu recently also, but it’s all relative !! for example if I had rabies and someone offered me Flu instead, I would bite your hand off.
Speaking of dogs I was chatting with Rob under the bus shelter and accidentally stood on one of Micks dogs, it yelped, jumped up and took a nip at my privates, ouch; Rob laughed and said it’s Karma, I said if anything Rob it looks even more angry now.
I decided to buy my wife some new fancy underwear instead, and went to a very nice store, I selected a few items and asked the assistant if these knickers were Satin, she looked horrified and said NO sir, they are all brand new. I did mention my wife is Asian and she sometimes mixes up words and meanings, for example I can say I arrived ahead of schedule, but she says premature.
My last wife claimed she was very smart and said she could name everyone at the round table, she would ramble on night after night after night. I was asked if I make jokes about anything ? I said probably, he said so what if some lions were devouring a Gazelle, I said sorry I don’t do Lion jokes, I pride myself.
I remember I met my first wife at a fancy dress party, she went dressed as a frisbee, she got really drunk and threw herself at me…..
Last week Eric Tomlinson gave me a copy of his autobiography, he said I haven’t managed to sell one of these, I said Eric that's disappointing to hear and also a little sad. He said yeah, tell me about it, story of my life !! Enough ? Haha.
Tuesday 3rd November
On what was a fantastic Autumn day and the sun once again shone. McCarlton updated everyone that there is no bowling this Thursday; therefore the league will conclude next Tuesday; however the start time will be earlier at 1200 noon, please be here in good time. Immediately following the bowling the presentations and Raffle will take place in the Club. If anyone is still to bring, or wishes to donate a raffle prize then please do so, as all items are very much appreciated.
McCarlton also confirmed that he would still take last entries for the Cup knockout competition which begins on the Thursday 12th November, the draw for this will take place also during the presentation.
What a day it was for action, tension and fantastic bowling by all the teams.
I have to start with the Old Hultonians playing away against Moss Bank; This turned out to be a titanic struggle (we also had a main character called Jack) who edged the first game playing alongside Graham Boardman 15-12, against the excellent pair of Glen Roberts and Peter Hardman. No pressure on Graham as most of his family turned out to support him, so many you could say it was a bus load. Next up were Mervyn and Geoff taking on the Old (Hultonians) stagers McCarlton and Phil Hodson, in an excellent game the ‘Olds’ took the win to 10 setting up a possible first win of the season…….. surely not ? Gary and David needed just 14 !! to win the match, and in a game which swung all ways, they did it. Congratulations to the Old Hultonians who might fancy their chances of doubling up in the final round of games this season.
The Hultoneers, league leaders, took on Clives Bunch, first up was a very nice man playing with AJ taking on the current hot form pairing of Bart and Rick. The game progressed well for the Ears and at 14-9 ahead it seemed over, or was it ? The bunchers pulled a couple back with some excellent bowls and 13 -14 down were holding 1 ...with 2 bowls left the Ears were then 1 in, Rick bowled a 'just enough' delivery knocking Barts bowl the 6" forward to hold shot, AJ just failed to connect and we were at 14 across. Then ensured the biggest controversy we have ever had at BWLOH, well this week at least After 7 bowls and to the eyes of the very nice man, and the 500 others who offered an opinion. It was finally decided that AJ ought not to bowl the last bowl in case he knocked the opponents in; So back everyones judgement, that the pegs would give them the game. However it didn’t, and to the total shock of the crowd Janet confirmed that Clives Bunch had indeed got the winning bowl. You would've have heard a pin drop, if it weren't for the motorway noise.
Next up Rob and Steve took on Maggie and Pat, once again the Hultoneers were 14-9 ahead and cruising up and down the green, however Pat, who isn’t known for throwing in the towel, won the downhill mark with a brilliant 8th. The game continued and next end the ears were lying 2 with one bowl to come, Pats bowl tracked all the way on the jack line before hitting it and moving it 6” forward turning the end from 2 down to 2 up. Once again we got to 14 across, Rob bowled 2 great bowls and Steve played a short, in the way, blocker. Cometh the moment cometh the Lady as Pat once again landed a 7th bowl winner, Steve was unable to match it and another game slipped away. The final match involved Brian Fairclough with Stevie G taking on the impressive team of Dave Norris and Peter Clinton, once again the match was close and in the balance. Unfortunately for Peter he was not able to pull any cards from up his sleeve and they went down to 13. To summarise, the aggregate was tied but Clives Bunch took the honours due to their 2 earlier wins 3-2.
In a line from a "source"….. it seems the Hultoneers were unrivaled in their ascent to the top of the league, unfortunately they then unraveled on the way down. It reminds me on a past girlfriend, she was very sporty and was a parachutist, she also had IBS ! Fair to say, this really didn’t end well for me either, in fact she s - - t on me from a great height.
When it comes down to business then the Wasps start buzzing, in the opening match Stuart Ivers and Mark took on the excellent pairing of Ian and Ray, this wasn’t a game to be missed, but if you blinked then you would have done, a 15 nil win was almost unbelievable, unless you witnessed the high quality bowls from the Wasps pairing, that set a big marker. The rest of the match generally followed suit with 2 further comfortable wins for the wasps to wrap up a very nice 5 nil win.
Lastly the Forresters took on Doe Hey, and again, a great start for the away team as Brian and Mark landed a 15-1, this was quickly followed by John and Mike taking a decisive 15-3 against Elaine and Tony, this almost wraps up the averages competition. They need only 5 chalks to claim the title and the £2.50 prize, that’s each, no cheap prizes at BWLOH !! I asked Mike B after his car broke down if he had called the AA RAC Green Flag ? he said just don’t get me started. Andy and Ray wrapped up with a 15-13 to put the Forresters atop of the league, what can possibly go wrong from here ??
Finally I was arguing with my wife on the weekend, always about money, she said and how much do you spend on a bottle of wine? I said around an hour. The hospital did release me in time for todays game and most of the swelling has gone down now.
We did make up and were drinking a very nice wine and I heard my wife whisper, “I love you so much, you know. I don’t know how I could ever live without you. Jokingly I said, “Is that you or the wine talking?” She said, “It’s me talking to the wine.”
I was sat thinking today as my wife is Asian, what if I originally came from Cork, would our son be Caucasian???
Thursday 29th
I was talking to Steve Nug before the off, he was saying his eyes weren't as good now when driving at night, in fact lately, he’s been running into pubs.
He also asked me what are the 2 meanings for Whittling ? first was easy, that’s shaving bits off a piece of wood to create something, I said what's the other ? He said its what all the other teams are doing to the Hulton Ears lead !!!!
On what is now a customary sunny day on the OH Riviera the teams were raring to go and some of them looked like they mean’t business…. McCarlton set the days proceedings off in his exuberant style. A special thanks to the Mc for getting involved with selling 2 football cards each match day, making 2 winners very happy.
Moss Bank took on the league leaders Hulton Ears, in a blistering start Jack and Graham were quicker out of the traps than Mick The Miller. Putting the pressure on to Monksy and Stevie G, before taking the game 15-6 And things didn’t get any better as Steve and Ronnie
saw off the very nice Mr Risley and Averages leader Andy Johnson to 2. Steve had again found the edge on the left side leading with some superb bowls, he would have taken a lot of wickets if he was a cricketer. Steve N. and Rob pulled a game back to ensure the Hulton Ears kept hold of top spot.
Was very nice to see the 3 low-flying military helicopters over the green this afternoon, I did note one of the passengers waved and then saluted to Steve Maslovic as he fired down another winner.He's kicking up a storm..... Apparently I cannot talk about this any further.
I heard Eric Tomlinson had reported a robbery as they were 14-13 up against Morty and Keith and lying 3, however Keith ‘adjusted’ the end with the final bowl and they then ran out 15-14. The next 2 matches featuring Stuart I and Braddy and then Stuart D and Mick both winning to 7 and taking all 5 points.
Next match was Forrests Rangers playing the Old Hultonians, The Openshaws were first up against Hardman and Roberts, however, in a display of fine bowling the underdogs found the marrow bone, chomping out to a 15-9 win. Wolfy and Bailey calmed the nerves playing some controlled bowls running out a 15-10 win against Gary and Derek and planting themselves back atop of the averages.. This set the match up for a decider as Brian and Mark took on (twin) Peak and Scully, this went decisively to the Forresters in a 15-6 win.
Clives Bunch took on Tom’s Lot, Rick Sykes and Bart, fresh from their latest 15 nil win took on Ray and David, and at 13 nil ahead held the game with 3 in, a great bowl from Ray saved the day but was soon over 15-2. This turned out to be the pièce de résistance and the bunch fell away to a 4-1 loss, topped by a superb win from Janet and Lawrence, beating Dave and Peter to 8.
The excitement is reaching fever pitch with just 2 games left and 4 teams all believing they will win the title. If this could get any more exciting I would be a very excited me. Crikey I'm looking forward to next week up diddly up, down diddly down, whoops, poop, twiddly dee – a decent scrap with the opposition and then back home in time for tea and crumpets.
Finally
Chatting to Rob about his latest Portuguese holiday he said the film on his flight back home was pretty boring, he said it was just an animation of a plane travelling from Portugal to Manchester, still watched it.
Talking of holidays I met my other wife on a beach, it wasn’t easy to say what she actually did, apparently she sells seashells by the seashore, the shells she sells are seashells, I'm sure. so if she sells seashells on the seashore, then I'm sure she sells seashore shells.
Before that I wanted to find a professional woman and met up with a Vet, it just didn’t work out as she was always trying to put me down.
After that I moved in with a professional cleaner, but she threw me out.
Tuesday 27th
It seems we got lucky once again with the weather on the Over Hulton Riviera (Costa Del Morton). McCarlton was in fine fettle and confirmed the teams had paid their dues, time after time, who will be the Champions ? Once again our compliments to Andy and the catering team who continue to deliver week in week out. I heard a little whisper that there may be a special dish on Thursday, Lamb which was reared in Wales, I always thought that was a typical stereotype. McC gave out his customary ‘lets bowl’ catchphrase and the teams were off.
The League Leader, Hulton Ears started the day off as per usual these days, taking on Doe Hey. With their opening pair of Stevie G and Paul Monks securing a very nice win. This was quickly followed the very likeable Mick Risley and top average player Andy Johnson, achieving a 15 nil.
Mick Risley is the only man (very nice) I know, travelled down to Tilbury to board his cruise for a trip to …….Liverpool, that was no bed of roses, no pleasure cruise, done him no harm though: Setting the stage for Rob and Steve to clean up all the points. On a day when Doe Hey refused to lie down and roll over, a spirited performance saw Gary Goulding and Peter Collier pull off a bit of a shock in a 15-13 win.:
Next up was Forrests Rangers away to Tom’s Lot, both teams looking for points to hang on to the Hultons Ears, The opening game saw a tough battle between the Openshaw Twins and the very consistent Ray Sale and David Wakefield, the match ebbed and flowed and could have gone either way before the brothers landed the win to 13. Next up was The Real Wolfendale and Mike Bailey (prefer the original version) versus Ian and Phil, this went generally one way, and the Rangers pair scored well to get their challenge back on track. Last up was the top pair of Mick and Barry taking on Mark and Brian, we had seen Barry and Mick discussing their tactics earlier in the day.
 This was a very edgy affair with both pairs trying to find a way to gain the advantage, Barry bowling consistently into the low sun (luckily there were no hurdles to jump) and uncharacteristically, putting 2 jacks into the ditch, not that any of us could see that. They were always just edging it and leading before it became a 12 across game, some nice bowls from the Forresters saw a 3 on what was the final end and a big win was completed.
Clives Bunch took on the Old Hultonions and achieved a 5 nil, however the result doesn’t tell the full story as the ‘Olds’ scored a 14, 13 and 12 respectively, perhaps each game could have swung the opposite way on just a single end………. but it didn’t A fine win for Pat Kitts and Barbara Mealor with some superb cross green bowling. The return of Rick has brought the best out of Harry also and they notched up another win along the way.
The final match saw Moss Bank taking on the Wasps, and in what was a surprise, a super performance from Maz and Ronnie saw off Stuart and Braddy to 8. Mervyn and Geoff fought out a tough game against Keith (back to 3 jacks) and Morty before going down to 13. This left the opportunity for the very in-form Jack Smith and Graham Boardman to take a big team win, however the Wasps had brought back their unbeaten player Mick Howard who teamed up with the ever improving Stuart Duncan and took the win to 12, Despite this, it wasn’t enough to take the aggregate and the Bankers ran out 3-2 winners.
We still have 4 teams all capable of winning the league and with just 3 rounds to go it’s all to play for.
There will be some tough selection challenges before Thursday.
Finally, a few of you have been asking me where I met my wife ? I’m not quite sure actually I remember getting my wallet out to pay for some drinks and there she was. She said she was a secretary but over the years she has progressed to be a financial controller. With her guidance we have been able to do without many things I don’t need !! I do have to admit though we have had 10 fantastic years together..... during our 18 year marriage. We only argue over small things but I don’t want to talk about that, it works…. !!!
Thursday 22nd
The day started with a downpour and ended in bright sunlight for those still around at the end.
The main match was the top 2 teams playing off, McCarlton had a passing interest in this, Forrests Rangers versus Hulton (ears) Celtic. The first game up Anderson and Warburton against Greenhalgh and Monks, didn’t get off to a prompt start as Steven completed his ablutions following a quick visit. The match started off fairly normally before dragging itself into a 1 up 1 down long drawn out affair. Many fine last woods were seen, and a few in off’s also!! Was finally concluded with Greenhalgh's Pies outstripping Warburton’s Baps to 13.
Second up was the very nice man they call Mick alongside the current top average player Andy Johnson, who were taking on Mike Bailey and John Wolfy; This was also an epic in terms of time and consisted of both pairs trying to out throw their opponents, mixed in with some very fine bowls. it went to a 14 across game and the nice man decided to go long from bottom left to top right, and ended with a very nice win to boot. Final game was played with the overall match still finely in the balance, however, in a largely one-sided affair Morton and Nugent took the honours to 6, collecting a maximum 5 team points along the way. Morton playing with a Colgate Ring and Nugent ……..well being Nugent. It seems that the Hultoneers all turned up with their game faces on (remind me to dust the Toby Jugs) played a great match, and took all of the spoils.
Toms Lot also took a maximum against Doe Hey, once again Ray and David started off strongly followed by the ultra consistent pair of Barry and Mick who are looking a class act this season. The icing on the cake was achieved by Janet and Lawrence taking the top win to 3 and rounding off a good day at the office. This result moving the team up to 2nd place, and just a point behind the leaders. Compliments also to Ian (pegs) Pendlebury for taking over this new role.
Clives Bunch took on Moss Bank with the away team eyeing up a win and the points. This didn’t get off to plan as a devastating win for Dave Norris and Peter Clinton seeing off Terry and Jim to 3.
Peter even had time during the game to warn the watching crowds of just how slippy the green could be. It transpired Mr. Bumble took a tumble, but was soon righted and back into play. I heard a few whispers afterwards saying it was a marketing stunt to sell off a surplus of get well cards. Moss bank roared back with a another fine win for Mr Smith and Mr Boardman taking out Maggie and Alan to 8. This tee'd up a winning opportunity for both teams in the final game, however the rejuvenated pairing of Simpson and Sykes (sounds like a Chemist Shop) delivered some knockout drops to luckless Mervyn and Geoff and claiming a 4-1 team win.
The final match involved Wasps taking on the Old Hultonians, however, an amazing opening game saw Peter Hardman (to beat) and Glen (mighty mushroom) Roberts set the ‘Old’s off dreaming of a first win with a 15-5 scoreline. Sadly, Stuart I and Braddy along with Keith (not 3 jacks) and Stuart Duncan saw out a good win, taking the aggregate by 4 chalks and the points 4 to 1.
The competition continues to hot up with another team sitting atop of the listings, with just 4 games left to play who will finish strongest ?
Finally many thanks for several of you asking if I really did meet my wife on a bowling picnic….. so sorry, but no, this was just a joke. In fact I married way too young, that the English spelling, she was Chinese. I met my second wife at a Castanet Club where we just clicked. My next wife was very sporty and I met her on the Golf driving range where we just hit it off.
The ups and downs of bowling, a dejected Mike Bailey sending 45yds for 2nd and 3rd (1 down)
Immediately followed by walking the tightrope at 47yds for a winner at match down
Wednesday 21st
Sometimes on a lovely sunny day by the lake you can witness a majestic swan, serenely moving across the water. What you don’t see is the engine room and the big flippers working hard to provide the motion.
This is a bit like the team here, they arrive early to ensure the food is ready and prepared, the water is boiled; cups, plates and cutlery are set out in position. The seats have been wiped down and cushions and coverings have been put out in good time. The green will have been switched to remove moisture/dew along with the fallen leaves. A massive and ongoing thank you to you all for facilitating this for our enjoyment and benefit. The power of the bowling community working together is phenomenal.
Did I mention I met my wife on a bowling picnic ? she was on the far side of the green and I thought she was striking......... however she just played a yard through and made 1. Next end I was in the middle of the green and I was thinking why does a bowl look bigger the closer it gets...... then it hit me.
Another fabulous day of bowling is planned for tomorrow: As Sgt. Stan Jablonsky used to say at the morning meeting on Hill Street Blues, "Lets get out there and do it to them before they do it to us" !!
Mr Paul Thorpe - Over Hulton Bowling Club
Tuesday 20th
The day was cool and overcast with a few light drops of rain, the mood very sombre. As MC Carlton took his usual position on the green, he was accompanied by all members of the home teams, who formed, and stood together in a semi circle. They were then also joined by all other team players to complete the circle from the shelter outwards.
Carlton gave the terribly sad news that Paul Thorpe had passed away on Monday evening. Paul had fought a long and hard battle, against cancer. We all stood for a minutes' silence to collect our thoughts and pay full respect to a high profile and very well liked Gentleman.
Paul played cricket at Farnworth CC, under the watchful eye of the senior players including Eric Tomlinson; he was also joined there by Paul Monks. It seems sportsmen are always going to be sportsmen and stick together. Paul was very competitive and direct, and also the OHBC Vets Captain alongside Stevie G. He wanted to win and to compete, and in this respect he did…...
In partnership with Paul Monks they became the first pairing from the Home teams to win Silverware in the BWLOH when they lifted the Fred Barnes Trophy in 2024/25
All our thought are now with Pauls wife Christine and their 2 daughters at this terribly hard time.
The Bowling
Doe Hey took on Clives Bunch and reasonably expected a win, all was going to plan also when Eric and Michael edged out Dave Norris and Peter (cards) Clinton to 14, this was swiftly followed up by Gary Goulding and Peter Collier cementing a 15-6 win (one of them must have been a builder). However, Clives Bunch had flown in a Special Agent called Rick who together with Harry (Bart) Simpson turned the match on it’s head by winning to nil to take the win.
Tom’s Lot got a surprise when the now firing partnership of Graham Boardman and Jack Smith handed a beating to Ian and (not) Fynon Dandy, however the ultra consistent Barry alongside his regular Mick, pulled it back with a fine win to 10 to tee up a thrilling finale. However Moss Bank failed to get over the line despite having 3 players in the match-up. Ray and David sailed though for a convincing win against the inform pair of Ronnie and Steve.
The top of the table clash started well for the Rangers, before the Wasps pair of Stuart Ivers and Mark Bradshaw handed out a first of the season defeat for the top pairing of John and Mike. The final game was nip and tuck throughout, and of course went to 14 across, before the Rangers pair managed a 4 on the final end. However the game was then already won by the Wasps.
The final match was the homesters local derby with The Hultoneers adjusting their team name to Thorpies Thunderbolts and then delivered a fitting 5-0 win for the in form Ears.
Finally……..
I was pointed to an interesting fact regarding Moss Bank by a……. what’s that word now, rhymes with Nerd, ah yes, a statistician. He reported that the 'Bankers' have won, or lost all of their games to a 4-1 scoreline, cheers Rob.
Footnote the word on the street is that the scoring system is slightly boring and perhaps an adjustment to the previous set up may improve this. 2 pts for each game win and 2 points for the match win so a clean sweep gains 8 or 9 points. The home advantage, (getting 3 blocks) should also be addressed with 3 pts being awarded to a winning away team. Also a losing pair gains a point if they score 12 or more, as already applied to the averages calculation. This will keep players striving till the end. It will help to separate the teams a little more also.......... thoughts and feedback please, this is your League.
Thursday 15th
A somewhat less than sunny day here on the Over Hulton Riviera, McCarlton was on good form, as always, as he opened proceedings, and even elicited a small round of applause. It reminded me of my other ex wife who was a singer, I remember her saying that it was always nice to get a warm hand on her opening.
I am asked and pleased to pass on our thanks and gratitude to Mal Cubbins who provided the Pea, Ham and Potato lunches today, complimented with a slice of French Stick, what a fantastic gesture and was much appreciated and enjoyed by one and all. Someone who can go the extra yard went the extra mile, many thanks indeed Mal.
Bowling can be a bit up and down, like one day you’re the top dog then the next you’re a lamppost.
Moss Bank took on Doe Hey in the reverse fixture, after 2 games the teams were once again a win each with the same scoreline in both, uncannily the same as the reverse fixture on Tuesday. Meaning the last pairings were playing for 3 points. However this time Moss Bank bucked up under the nose of watching team captain Chris Barnes and took the win. Jack Smith dispelling any rumour that he and Graham Boardman were a cursed pairing.
Forrests Rangers repeated the scoreline of Tuesday with a 5-0 win over Clives Bunch and slipped 3 pts clear at the top.
The Hulton Ears also repeated their win against the Wasps who have seen a 5 point lead disappear into a 3 point deficit this week following their consecutive 4-1 losses. The final game seeing Keith (3 Jacks) Waddington losing his unbeaten tag, all this was happening whilst another unbeaten player (and 3 dogs) were watching on from the sidelines.
Tom’s Lot continued to improve and gained a 4-1 win against the luckless Old Hultonians. This is despite their pairing of David Beresford and Peter Hardman setting them off with a great win against Ray and David W.. Both David B. and Peter have a habit of winning when the going gets classed as heavy. Gary Yates and Derek McNulty still had a chance to gain the Old’s a first win but was not to be as Pengy and Fynon cleaned up with a 15-3 win. And this was despite Gary Yates having to put up with the chants from the crowd of ‘Are you Stuart Ivers in disguise” ? We noted his gilet was ex Royal Mail, despite this he didn’t find any left handed letter boxes today.
We now have 4 teams just 3 points apart at the top and everything is there to play for. We would be foolish also to rule out Moss Bank especially as Steve and Ronnie seem to have found the edge now on their opponents.
A great story here, from someone I know: I said I would be discreet about names as don’t want to embarrass Nugs. He woke up at 0500 and started a little scrolling and read his horoscope. It told him all the stars were aligned today and his lucky number would be 5. Later he looked at the list of races, there were 5 meetings, so he went to the 5th one and noted there was a 5’o'clock race !!! So intrigued, he had a look at the runners and to his disbelief, there was a horse running called Five Alive and it was at 5/1. So no messing about, he put £50 on the nose. And you wouldn’t believe this I checked the results later and........ it finished……. 5th !!!
We had a worst bowl of the day contender also today, with the effort pulling up 27yds short of the jack, as a trusted reporter of facts and details that bowler specifically requested I didn’t name him. I gave him my word and he’s such a nice, very likeable man also, why would I do that.
Tuesday 13th
Another fabulous day for bowling, was enjoyed by one and all as we now embraced the halfway stage in the League. And as usual our McCarlton set the proceedings underway with a cry of "LET'S BOWL". We have been asked to clarify that the Mc refers to 'master of ceremonies' and that Carlton wishes it known he is not Scottish and furthermore we have been sent a picture to confirm this.
McCarlton.
The first match on the list was Doe Hey versus Moss Bank, I think most of us knew which way this would go........ until it didn't !! a 15-4 win for Eric and Michael was then equalled by Ronnie and Steve, down to the last game all square. After a great battle the pairing of Mal Cubbins and Steve Partington just edged out the star pair of Mervyn and Geoff 15-13. Doe Hey now on a 3-timer playing against the same opposition on Thursday.
Next up was Forrests Rangers against Clives Bunch, a maximum win topped off by the top average pairing of John and Mike winning 15-2, can they be caught ?
3rd match down was Tom's Lot playing the Old Hultonians and the welcome return of Ian Pendlebury and Phil Dandy back to the fray, they didnt disappoint, with Toms Lot also running out to a maximum win. To the watching fans they didn't get to see the Mulder/Skully parnership as Mulder was delayed as he was batting at No6 for South Africa in the test match versus Australia. In a late change to the line up saw Lawrence Catterall replace Mick Fletcher. Mick explained confidentially to us, that whilst he was bending over in the bathroom he felt a sharp pain in the 'behind area'. We didn't probe him further on this matter.
The final match up was the Hulton Ears playing 'away' against the Wasps, The Hulton boys were eyeing an upset and got off to ........... a bad start as the ever excellent Stuart Ivers and (3 Jacks) Keith set the challenge, running out to a 15-6 win against home stalwarts Steven Greenhalgh and Paul Monks. Next up was the eagerly awaited game featuring Morty and the returning Mark Bradshaw facing the new pretenders Steven Nugent and the impressive Rob Morton. The game set off fairly tight before the Hulton team pulled ahead. A moment of tension midway through as Steve bellowed across am I in ? Rob said 'your bowls in the ditch Steve' to which Steve bellowed then why didn't you tell me, so not only his ears !!! Leading 13-9 the Hultons thought they had the match in hand, lying 2, Morty and Braddy were not in agreement. As the Nug walked to the end his usual 2-step, quick step around followed by 3 more circles and then the tip toes of the Nug's trusty Hi-Tec trainers ,it was finally decided to ask Janet (pegs) to the green to resolve the discussion. Steve had already declared they were in by 4 inches, he clearly knows his length well, and to everyones surprise he was right and it was game over. The final drama turned out a little less so. and the (very nice) Mick Risley partnered well by Andy Johnson got over the line with a little in hand. Andy filling in when Micks batteries started to run down. The highlight of this game was when Micks hat decided it was going to leave him and jumped off his head floating 6ft away.
This result has blown the championship race wide open and now 4 teams are eyeing the prize.
Having a chat with our mountain man, Glenn Roberts, he shared a little bit of his expert knowledge of wild mushrooms. He explained that there is currently an abundance (right time of the year). He further alluded to books he has at home published back in the late 40's and 50's which were hand illustrated using water colours and containing references to 1000 UK varieties. He did say that you really do need to know what you are doing and related his intolerance to Porcini mushrooms. Apparently 1 in a 1000 people have a very bad allergic reaction to this variety, himself being one. I can usually relate to the main allergies In a nutshell. However after a Porcini incident, a few hours in the bathroom firing at both ends was not a pleasant experience, but a good time to read a book. We discussed other varieties and what the hippies liked in the 60's, in fact it was a magical time chatting to him. For those not that familier with Glenn he is the one standing at the end of the RHS leaner, he's a little taller than his team mates. In fact we also have a picture of him
Glenn Roberts - Mushroom Man
On a final note I remember my ex-wife once more, we were at a gathering of friends and she had had a couple. She was telling everyone around that she was the one who had invented the echo, I walked over and told her will you just listen to yourself...yourself, self.
Monday 12th
More from our Fleetwood Mac reporter: we hear the Old Hultonians may be making a late new signing, a top player named Joe Mulder, he is rumoured to be playing with Andy Scully, lets see what happens, maybe just one for the X-Files.
Looking ahead to the weeks matches, the 1st half of the revolving double. Doe Hey take on Moss Bank, as they say when the going gets tough, Doe Hey get going, forecast is for 1-4 home defeat. Next up is Forrests Rangers against Clives Bunch, on paper this could be one-sided, however Forrests Rangers have found more Banana skins lately than a large group of chimpanzees having a picnic.
The Old Hultonians take on Tom's Lot, can the Olds get a first win ? will not be an easy task but we can all hope. Finally the last pairing is the Top game with the Wasps taking on the current in-form team of The Hultoneers. Will the Wasps retain the same line up as last time out ? The ears are 11/10 for a win whilst the Wasps are favourites at 8/13.
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